Seeking real life advice from men who might have been there & found balance with their wife.?

I will be married almost 3 years to the man I believe is my soulmate. This is my 2nd marriage, and his 1st. My question is about the ';Madonna vs. Whore'; idea with men, and is it maybe what my husband is going through? During our 2 years of dating, sex was great. Now, almost right after the honeymoon, he has told me that once a month is perfectly fine with him. We talked about our sexual experiences before marrying, and he told me he had a threesome. I had a sex life, but I thought he topped me! Now after the honeymoon, I found out most of his ';history'; was made up. It seems that his sexual past was more like ';in the dark, and done in five minutes- missionary only';. Sex is not the end all be all for marriage, but I would like it everyday. We try buying toys, but he gets shy about using them. He likes porn, but says he can't watch it with me. He has trouble getting it ';up'; sometimes, but gets it ';up'; in mere seconds if I wake him from a dead sleep. It seems to be in his head. Any ideas?Seeking real life advice from men who might have been there %26amp; found balance with their wife.?
You could try letting him feel like he is the one in charge. For example, dress pretty and attractive, and have a romantic dinner, but let HIM make all of the moves. Be a little bit passive, for example, if he kisses you kiss him back, but do not wrap your arms around him and start tearing his clothes off right away, be a little flirty but innocent at the same time. It's all about creating the ';illusion'; that he is in charge. Of course this does not ALWAYS have to be the case, but its a suggestion for some night where you want some...which from what it looks like, would be tonight, or tomorrow, or the next day.....lol. Sex is different for all people, we all have things that push our buttons one way or the other, and its just how were programmed. Don't ever think there's something wrong with you,......alot of guys lie about their past to make themselves look more like a stud.......it's not right to do, but it happens, and its in the past. My best to you. Praise God.Seeking real life advice from men who might have been there %26amp; found balance with their wife.?
Tell him it's not fair that you can't watch too.





(He is probably having a little too good of time watching them and not leaving anything for you)





When you watch them with him don't hesitate to get things going.


Movies seem to make for quick ***.





After a few times suggest skipping the movies.


That's when you suggest the toys, let him pick but recommend special ones if needed.
r u kidding?
Sounds to me like the old do what it takes to get what you want syndrome.. False advertising you might say. Well you have to decide if your sex life is important enough to end another relationship or ask him if you can have an open marriage. Or suggest counseling.. Otherwise this is going to cause big trouble down the road. Good luck
sometimes men feel freaky when the whore side is let out, indeed his talk about 3 somes and past sexual conquests is proof that he wants the whore... in his mind.. thus he can watch porn.. do his thing and it's all he needs


he may truly fear your reaction to him like you may think you've married some sort of sicko.. and that the scary part


if you want to be his little whore that he wants


then you may have to slowly work your self into that role


and once he feels comfortable, he will go from fantisy to reality


but the key is once you into that type of sex life... you may indeed open pandora's box.. so don't be too freaked out when he comes with more requests.. such as 3 somes ect,,,,


that's why you have to ask yourself what do you really want and is it worth it..


trust me at 39 he is still going... he may not be physically cheating on you


but in his mindset he has sex with all the women on the porn and porbaly hot looking ones he sees on the street


maybe you can give him 2 am oral sex for a suprise and let him take over
I think he is going through the so-called Madonna/whore thing. If not he has some serious hang ups about sex in general. I can only recommend patience with him. Have you told him you would enjoy sex more often? Maybe he feels that'; puritan guilt'; associated with sex in some countries. (USA included)
I think your right. It is in his head. Keep trying. If he is open to trying new things like you say then try some different things. Such as sex with the lights on. Strart out with very dim lights and work your way up. Maybe this will help get him use to seeing what is going on. A good book on different positions would be good. I must say it has sparked our marriage. And we have found some great positions. My wifes favorite is upside down 69. I must say it is a rush. I think in the long run you if you stay persistent you will find that sex life your both looking for.